Winter Leaves

For these colder and darker days

know the sun will come again



The cost of the fun police… Individuality, comedy and laughter.

Observations of a Middle-Aged Dragon with a Tattoo:

The cost of the fun police… Individuality, comedy and laughter.

Bring back Mae West: I believe in censorship. After all, I made a fortune out of it.

Don’t get me wrong I think minimizing racism, misogyny and bullying is very good. But we are becoming so sensitive that we can’t seem to laugh at ourselves. With social platforms beaming peoples’ quips and thoughts instantaneously to sooo many people rather than this allowing people to experience all forms of opinions and become more broadminded. Instead we have seen the general populous become so sensitive and seemingly always on the look out to be offended about ANY thing. No longer can we laugh at ourselves or be a little forgiving to a scathing wit.


If Dorothy Parker was around now she would have been sued out of town and sacked from many jobs. Her comment about Katherine Hepburn in her early acting days; like “She runs the gamut of emotions from A to B,” got published and were applauded and considered worthwhile. Dorothy Parker was an American writer and poet best known for her caustic wit, wisecracks, and sharp eye for 20th century urban foibles.

Did Katherine Hepburn shrink and cower under the weight of such observations, did she sue Parker? Did she ask for Parker’s head and get her sacked? NO!! Instead she kept working at her craft to become the most Oscar awarded female actress EVER….

Even more best actress Oscar awards wins than the amazing Meryl Streep and despite what Donald Trump says – I’m with Robert De Niro who said at the Tony’s 2018: ‘Fuck Trump’ and got a standing ovation.

Despite what President Trump says Meryl’s an exceedingly talented actress, easily in the top 3 of the best Actress’ of our time. (Katherine Hepburn has 4, Meryl only 2 best actress awards and 1 for best supporting actress).


Give Rosanne a second chance (is that a 50th chance..).

I think her rendition of the Star Spangled Banner at a US baseball game many years ago (1990), see the sadness here! It was more of a crime, than what she said on twitter. WAS the tweet really that bad…. The singing yes…. The tweet is something that should have been slapped down but let’s have a discussion about it and not summarily strike it down to be silenced and take away her livelihood (although I suspect she’s still got a few mil lying around). Hitler and Stalin used censorship, bullying and terror to stop freedom of speech…. Not nice guys.


AND YES surprise, surprise, I can,… NOT like Mr Trump and YES I still can also think that political correctness has run amok. People are less likely to have diverse opinions for fear that having them may offend. But aren’t we all individuals and isn’t it because of individuality that we have such amazing skills allowing us to innovate and create. If we all thought alike no innovation and creativity would exist….. Point: The Rosanne show, for many years was the only show on TV that reflected the struggles of the little people (there have been many of types of these shows). People actually watched and loved Rosanne for her wit, her scathing sarcasm and honesty about American life when you don’t have a squillion dollars. Couldn’t get that from the Cosby Show and I’m not being racist I’m looking at content and reality. But take Good Times now that was a show way ahead of its time. Not sugar-coating reality.


I’ve got far tooooooo serious,

Bringing back the whimsy……Remembering the timeless MAE WEST:

The real beauty of Mae West: Definitely a woman before her time and the juice to prove it. How would political correctness deal with her today?

 Source: George Tiffin: All the Best Lines: An informal history of the movies in quotes, notes and anecdotes.

Mae West: 1893-1980. She was a child actor she found her way to vaudeville. In 1926 at the age of 33 she wrote, directed and starred in the Broadway play Sex.

Arrested on charges of obscenity, she served ten days in jail telling reporters she had worn silk underwear throughout her stay. At the age of 38 she signed a contract with Paramont. During her first film, Night After Night (1932), she insisted on rewriting many of her scenes, prompting her co-star George Raft to declare: ‘she stole everything but the cameras.’

Although a supporter of women’s liberation, she never declared herself a feminist and remained as famous for her sexual innuendo in real life as on screen. 

Many of her quotes and quips have stood the test of time.

When women go wrong, men go right after them.

When caught between two evils I generally pick the one I’ve never tried before.

When I’m good, I’m very good. But when I’m bad, I’m better.

Good girls go to heaven. Bad girls go everywhere else.

I used to be Snow White, but I drifted.

Ten men waiting for me at the door? Send one of them home, I’m tired.

A hard man is good to find.

I believe in censorship. After all, I made a fortune out of it.

I only like two kinds of men: domestic and foreign.

To err is human, but it feels divine.

Is that a gun in your pocket or are you must glad to see me?

Marriage is a great institution, but I’m not ready for an institution yet.

Sex is emotion in motion… love is what you make it and who you make it with.

Those who are easily shocked should be shocked more often.

I always save one boyfriend for a rainy day… ad another in case it doesn’t rain.

LONG LIVE the spirit of MAE!!!!

Bring some of that spirit back to your life. Dare you to...


There’s IQ and now EQ. I’m wondering there must be SQ…. therefore Sexual Intelligence.

Observations of a Middle-Aged Dragon with a Tattoo: 

There’s IQ and now EQ. I’m wondering there must be SQ…. 

therefore Sexual Intelligence.

Let me explain:

Stephen Hawking sadly passed away not that long ago. There was much talk about his intelligence – IQ. IQ being the measure of a person’s intelligence.

He and Einstein were the great genius’ over the last century, both having IQs of 160, a perfect score being 162.


Now we have EQ:

The emotional intelligence quotient of a person. EQ reflects a person’s ability to empathize with others: identify, evaluate, control and express one’s own emotions. As well as to perceive and assess others’ emotions; use emotions to facilitate thinking, understand emotional meanings. Source Home page: A perfect score is 160. People high in EQ for example are: Nelson Mandela and Oprah Winfrey.

Oprah Winfrey: 

Other Examples: can be found if you click my source here:

Winston Churchill — Perhaps because of his own basket of insecurities, Churchill was an astute leader in harrowing times; he tapped into the emotions of his country and rose to the challenge, balancing cold calculations with emotional understanding.

Abraham Lincoln — Arguably the epitome of the emotionally intelligent President of the United States, Lincoln pressed on with monumental changes using his own internal compass, even when all his advisers pointed in other direction.

All this posturing got me thinking:

Just as there are Maths Genius’ with high IQs and Emotionally Strong Leaders, who show high EQ - why haven’t we, the human race, devised a way to measure someone’s Sexual Intelligence. 

Could you measure Sexual intelligence? Would you, could you rate it so a perfect score was 160 like the other measures?

That’s not necessarily measuring sexual prowess, or stamina. They most likely would be two characteristics of a person with an amazing – if not magical understanding of the needs of a woman or a man – and have the capacity to deliver this regularly. Would Sexual Intelligence be called SQ? Would a person with high SQ be a Sexual Genius? Why not?

Would SQ characteristics be measured by:     






Skill-How would this be measured? The mind boggles, but it would be fun designing and testing such a scale and then a test to deliver a score. Would there be a practical element????


Why can’t we celebrate openly a great, lover? A person who is a Sexual Genius’. People who just know how to make love like no other. Just as there won’t be another Nelson Mandala or Einstein, in a generation, is there a sexual genius out there who we are missing out on learning from?

Was Casanova one or Catherine the Great? Not forgetting Cleopatra and Marc Antony. Reputation certainly precedes all of these.

The closest I’ve come in my research is a reference made to Erotic Intelligence…

But I ask do we have to go that hard core, plus there already is an EQ. So why not have Erotic knowledge or proclivity as a characteristic of overall Sexual Genius… Maybe we should start a movement.

A lady who seems to be on to something is Esther Perel with her book: Mating In Captivity: Unlocking Erotic Intelligence. In a 2013 interview with the Huffington post her words caught my eye on what SQ would in essence be about: “When I work with sexuality in couples, I rarely work on helping them have sex. You can have sex and feel nothing. Women have done this for centuries. I work on the poetics of sex. I work on how they connect to their own erotic self. Basically, I work at how they beat back deadness, which is the prime reason for affairs.”

Marc and Cleo  

The article makes for very interesting reading: See this Huffington Post article

Either way enjoy your contemplation of this subject, it’s a great conundrum to be faced with, especially if your research means you’re investigating subjects who look like these guys:


He could dust his sand off on my rug any time. 


There are many possibilities…. dare you to...

As Man-Flu season descends upon us....

Observations of a Middle-Aged Dragon with a Tattoo:

As Man-Flu season descends upon us....


There maybe another way....

My Nonna used to say if you feel a cold or flu coming on just drink a bottle of Marsala that night, in the morning you'll wake up and you won't be worried about the cold or flu.

Dare you to...



What if you could rate how good men are in bed by the car they drive?

Observations of a Middle-Aged Dragon with a Tattoo:   


What if you could rate how good men are in bed by the car they drive?

It's a long observation this week but it could just be worth it.

Bear with me this may be a more of an accurate predictor of sexual prowess than you think.

Here are some examples:


Nothing says whipped or my balls are in a vice like a guy driving a dented mini-van going 50km/h in a 60km/h zone and to top it off who breaks going downhill. Don’t touch with a pike pole. Scream's divorcee and too tired to lift his own weight. NO sign of a wham bam thankyou mamm, man here!


Middle-aged man, balding (any man actually) driving a late model mustang. I have noticed a marked increase in these American muscle cars around the burbs.

Mustang (Ford) has made a concerted effort to market their latest model very hard in recent years. ALAS: what does this say about the man in bed.

Probably, not so hard but he'll be a TRY HARD especially if he calls his car a 'Tang'. The original Mustang is Iconic. But this latest model to kind of quote William Shakespeare, it's just protesting a little too much with its long front and a short end. Might be big up front but can’t sustain it, hence the short back end. Ladies it’ll be over before you know it.

To paraphrase Paul Hogan in Crocodile Dundee that’s not a muscle car (not in Australia anyway, maybe not anywhere).


<<<<< BUT THIS  -  this is a muscle car:

The V8 Holden Commodore HSV GTS series now we’re talking Australian…. Grunt, grit, but more of a blunt instrument, not likely to be smooth. A bit rough through the gears, especially when at the end of his range. It’s a matter of taste if you like that sort of rough, tough, roll in the hay, and not much foreplay (lets face it, with a commodore what you see is what you get: no subtlety here) Good rating overall: but don't expect surprises or finesse (no peacock feathers or blind folds). Nonetheless, a big engine that'll go all night.

LOOK OUT for the slightly tougher, bigger brother to the V8 Holden HSV GTS introducing the V8 Holden HSV GTS ..... Maloo UTE now we’re really talking Australian, real occa Aussie.

Most likely a tradie or if it hasn’t got a scratch on it, a wannabe tradie. Warning ladies this man maybe in love with his car more than anything else in the world. Danger, Danger Wilma Robinson.


CHEAPSKATES that come up even cheaper in bed. Overcompensation: A small end car with no guts or style but it has all the fruit. Is the owner over compensating for something?? Usually shown to have not enough get up and go or staying power. Sloppy handling, very average performance, and most likely cheap but adds a few trimmings to make out he’s the real deal. Proof is in the pudding and there is no afternoon delight to be found here. Steer clear…

Grunt models of Mercedes Benz or BMW: you’ll do alright as will he. Real get up and go, off the mark quick and suspension fairly stiff. Stiff enough to take the corners hard. But in the long run still depending on the model not the real grunt some of us may need for full satisfaction between the sheets. Unless it's a BMW M model suped-up to the MAX.


Smaller Mercedes convertibles: these cars have been known as hair dressers' car or handle like a lounge chair. So what does that say about the man. Likely he's small and showy even if the outer package is a fine design. Only a little bit of grunt, but in the end unsatisfying when it comes to stiff performance! Neat and tidy if you like that sort of thing in your men, (I do around the house but not so much in the bedroom, well not to this extreme: screams OCD).



Ferraris: Mmmm debate is open. Overall the super car is an acquired taste. Fast, stylish, proven performance but maybe a bit too into himself. That is ladies, it’s going to be all about him…. as he checks  himself out in any mirror close by. Not sure we get a look in, but a test drive would sure be fun. Older Ferraris can overheat on hot days.  Not sure of length of performance in warmer Australian climes.

Porsche drivers: notoriously know as wankers, but the cars are good. Alas that still sees the majority of guys who own Porsches not knowing how to drive them or get the best performance out of them. They are driving it because it’s a Porsche. Somehow, they are probably the same it bed. They just don’t know how to use it or get the best performance out of it. All that style and horsepower goes to waste ….. operator error likely. All show, no real go. To be honest sometimes the shape can look all wrong. Definitely one to steer clear of, or a lot of ground-work is needed to suss out specs and capability!! If you find that rare breed of Porsche driver; the guy who knows how to drive it. GO FOR IT.

Is it a Four-Wheel Drive or SUV? 

The jury is out, again it’s a matter of gradations.


SUVs: These vehicles, while theoretically sports utility vehicles, are rarely really sporty and come up short. Take ages to get off the mark as the engine is usually underpowered. You're in soccer Mum territory, a tough look on a woman not so much for a man. Really what does that say about the man driving the base model NO.



REAL 4WD: In Australia we used to call most of these so-called Sports Utility Vehicles four-wheel drives. That's because they were authentic off-road vehicles, who handled any bush really well. No waxing needed here. If you can find an original that's a bona fide 4WD then yes: DO IT.

Ready for anything, stiff suspension, good grip and very, very much full of staying power. Good torque; a little like the V8 Commodore GTS, but bigger clearance great for rough terrain.

But back on the emasculated, purpose-build American SUVs, that vaguely look like they are four-wheel drives. Don't be fooled they aren’t. What you really have is a big trunk, (rear end or boot), roomy, almost too big causing usually soft, sloppy performance. All that glitters isn't gold. Plus suspension is saggy;definitely not stiff enough. In short: Don’t waste your time, a bit hit and miss in the bedroom and on the road for that matter. Lacks consistency in the performance stakes. A little meek and mild although looks big. NEED I SAY MORE: I mean look at it; a cake of soap has more shape and appeal.


<<< HOTTED UP SUVs: Further up the range or should I say the food chain. You may find a WOW mamma moment! Now we're torqueing, and this guy is much stiffer all round. A powerful lover sometimes turbo charged (the mind boggles).

Loads of grunt and a thrill to have driving (into) you. Performance is always there. Maybe a bit showy and little too into himself worth the experimentation.

DON'T GET TOO CARRIED AWAY: SUVs with too much fruit: Screams rapper wannabe: RUN far and fast. Signals misogynistic, disrespectful… all bluster and no bang. >>>>>>


<<<<OTHER SUVs: This SUV is too equestrian, that’s horsey and upper class. The whole stiff upper lip, may not be good at down and dirty. Soft. DON'T GO HERE unless you like the prim and proper type.... why???

Not forgetting REAL iconic FOUR-WHEEL DRIVES:

Reliable rough and tough: Toyota HiLux: Unbreakable whether the top-line model with all the trimmings or the down and dirty base model. No social graces, or sophistication, but reliable, rough, and tough. Ready to get down and dirty, no show pony but not subtle either. Don’t expect any finesse or a warm cuddle afterwards,unless you have a guy who's the top model with all the optional extra's; foreplay maybe an optional extra as well.


Last but not least the Suburu WRX: Simply the best of both worlds. Grab and bag him, ladies. Great BANG for your buck or is that f#ck! No more need be said. Go for it!



There you have it, the bare bones of a guide. Let's face it; knowledge of any kind, is power. To be ahead of the curve in any game saves time and in this game in particular, any extra ammo is gold.

Most models of cars will fit within the guidelines above so rate away. The world is your oyster! 

Above all have fun and laugh at yourself and life... it's too short not to.  Dare you to...

The definitive relationship thermometer...Do you and your paramour fling or fold your clothes?

Observations of a Middle-aged Dragon with a tattoo: 


The definitive relationship thermometer... 

Do you and your paramour fling or fold your clothes?

Take your mind back (way, ....way back for some of us). Brush the cobwebs off, shake yourself around and remember - the person you were in love/lust with in those days. When passion between you and your dearly intended was unbridled - wild and uninhibited. Where you couldn’t wait to rip the clothes off your partner and vice-versa, so you could delve into the depths of the white-hot passion of the beast with two backs.

In those days you couldn’t wait - didn’t think; became disengaged and - just let goooooooooooooooo. Various pieces of clothes were flung all over the place. You didn’t care if your dress/shirt/ bits and pieces were expensive silk or lace, etc – lust trumped them. Didn’t matter where or what they landed on as they provided a trail like Hansel and Gretel's breadcrumbs through parks, bushes, grass, home pathways, porches, living rooms, or even shag-pile carpet that crunched under foot. Passionate ecstasy ruled! Long, live lust. Viva la luxure....



Then something happened you either broke up and moved on to the next hurricane of horny or

The relationship progressed - the passion was still there it just burned a little less intense but it' was still white-hot. Clothes only come off in the hallways and bedroom, flung far and wide. Decorating ceiling fans, stereo speakers, light fittings and floors.

Then..... you and your partner sailed further into unchartered relationship waters. Passion burnt deeper and was somehow richer. While lust and passion burned not so white-hot, the feeling of being together was almost overwhelming. The clothes were thrown in piles on chairs or the floor. You are older and convention necessitates that maybe you are better at delayed gratification, so you take care to look after your attire. BUT oddly less patient the morning after. You don’t want to have to run around all over the place looking for pieces of your ensemble. You want to have some decorum and sophistication to your exit and somehow you know, this your sharing, means more.

Then, POW! Wham bam: you may not have realised it but something has snuck up on you, like a slow fold: sharp, perfect and neat. You're in long-term relationship territory. How do you recognise this? Again the clothes have it… because by this time you and your partner are using hangers for items of your kit, carefully folding your garb neatly on chairs etc; no longer the floor. And…. if you’re really in relationship longevity… you and your partner have chairs or special shelf space to put your garments in/on before diving into the passion pool.


And there you have it… the clothes/relationship thermometer - a prediction of your relationship status.

Be warned it is a sliding scale moving back and forth depending on the moment in your space time/relationship continuum.

So are you a flinger or a folder….. thus are you and your partner at the short-term fling stage (pardon the pun) or are you in for the long-term relationship haul - with your ordered and sophisticated neat folds.


Ahhh.... there are many levels of Multitasking


Observations of a Middle-Aged Dragon with a Tattoo: 



The classics still have a way of guiding us

Observations of a Middle-Aged Dragon with a Tattoo:

The classics still have a way of guiding us - even in today's changed world!


When I let my mind run wild and hold the hand of wishful thinking....

Observations of a Middle-Aged Dragon with a Tattoo:

Sometimes I let my mind run wild and hold the hand of wishful thinking....



A glass or two of champagne also helps!!


(after 3 or 4 his belly-button starts following you around the room no matter where you are, that's when it's time to stop)

Sometimes I want to say - Hey you narcissist numbnuts

Observations of a Middle-Aged Dragon with a Tattoo:

Hey you narcissist numbnuts don’t just talk to the hand. TALK to this...