Advice to Daughters about Men

Observations of a Middle-aged Dragon with a tattoo:  

Advice to Daughters

Don’t imagine you can change a man, unless he’s in diapers.

What do you do if your boyfriend walks out? You shut the door.

If they put a man on the moon, they should be able to put them all up there.

Never let your man’s mind wander, it’s too little to be out alone.

Go for younger men. You might as well they never mature anyway.

Men are all the same, they just have different faces, so that you can tell them apart.

Definition of a bachelor: a man who has missed the opportunity to make some woman miserable.

Women don’t make fools of men, most of them are the do-it-yourself types.

Best way to get a man to do something is to suggest they are too old for it.

Love is blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener.

If you want a committed man, look in a mental hospital.

The children of Israel wandered around the desert for 40 years. Even in biblical times, men wouldn’t ask for directions.

If he asks what sort of books you’re interested in, tell him check books.

Remember a sense of humour does not mean that you tell him jokes, it means that you laugh at his.

Sadly, all men are created equal. 

(Unknown)

Share a laugh with your daughters. Dare you to…


The Serena Dilemma: Saint or sinner

Observations of a Middle-aged Dragon with a tattoo:

The Serena Dilemma: Saint or sinner.

Is she a doyen of female rights or simply a precocious bad-mannered brat?

This is the question. There’s no denying she is a wonderful female athlete, philanthropist, strong woman and a stylish dresser.

But she also can be entitled, self-important and arrogant. This time I wonder if the blow-up wasn’t more about her own frustration at not playing her best, rather than anything to do with women’s rights.

Was it women’s rights or a frustrated smoke screen pieced together hastily after she started losing - not only the match but her cool. A good story to try and seem like Serena's bad behavior was for a worthwhile cause, championing for the end to institutional sexism. The right for a woman athlete who has a sports bra on to change her shirt at the change of ends in a tennis match!

No one will ever fully know, as it is only Serena who really knows herself. Was she being true to herself and honest with the world and the realm of women’s rights - or simply unable to cope with being blown off the court.

Let’s face it she’s done this before at the US Open. Remember the reprehensible 2009 Serena Williams outburst in the semi-final against Kim Clijsters. That time the umpire was a woman (no-where to pull the gender card) as was the lineswoman who called Serena for a foot-fault and Serena was accused of saying she’d kill her. 

As for the cartoon fracas: as I’ve said many times before people need to be able to laugh at themselves and GET over it. Political Correctness as a form of censorship is one of the most pernicious and dangerous aspects to our present society.

It was rightly asked later this week; WHY was that particular cartoon singled out as racist: Here’s how other cartoonists have drawn Serena….. these aren't particularly flattering either and no one sent their creators death threats?? 

When people wrote and posted obscene things about the cartoon that Mark Knight drew, I was brought back to the shootings on 7 January 2015 in which twelve people were killed at the offices of the French satirical magazine Charlie Hebdo. Here Islamic radicals shot up the offices of the magazine for posting what they saw as disrespectul cartoons about Islam and the prophet Mahomed. 

I bet the same people crying foul this week, were also appalled at the actions of the Muslim radicals back then (and rightly so). The attacks this week on Mark Knight, while nowhere as violent, were still born from the same lack of an ability to laugh at ourselves (remembering: cartoons aren’t actual pictures they are caricatures!). Also from a lack of understanding of what freedom of speech and freedom of expression really means, that is the ability to have acceptance for all opinions. We are the West - we champion free speech and this is the price we pay - diversification - acceptance of all views. 

Pause for a minute:

Let’s Remember: "Je suis Charlie" (French pronunciation: [ʒə sɥʃaʁli], French for "I am Charlie") is a slogan and logo created by French art director Joachim Roncin and adopted by supporters of freedom of speech and freedom of the press after twelve people were killed at the offices of French satirical magazine Charlie Hebdo.

Me thinks everyone is protesting too much; maybe for the wrong reasons. At the end of the day this is an amazing sportsperson regardless of sex, yet, it was also an example of entitlement, disrespect, bad manners, and abhorrent behavior. 

As the dust settled; players, umpires, sports commentators and some of the public were questioning whether in future do Serena’s games have to umpired to a different set of rules, not those everyone else plays by. Surely; no-one is bigger than the game.

As for the anaemic argument that men were never drawn that way, 

I beg to differ see the examples here of John McEnroe. 

Plus Nadal, Federer and Djokovic would never have gone off at an umpire so viciously and persistently. 

And down the other end - holding it altogether with grace and courage was Naomi Osaka:

*For anyone who doesn’t know this is Naomi Osaka. She is 20 years old and on the night of Saturday September 8th 2018 she became the US Open champion. She received no coaching, broke zero rackets, and treated the umpire and her opponent with respect throughout. Unfortunately nobody is talking about her.... *Source Jonathan Bennett

 


Endangered and extinct alcohol species

Observations of a Middle-aged Dragon with a tattoo:  

Endangered and extinct alcoholic species

If you are a child of the 70s, 80s and even the 90s some of the alcohol you used to drink is no longer available or very scarce or considered bad-form to order and far worse to drink.

Aspersions will be cast on your character, if you're seen in public quaffing these drinks: but hey, for some of us that's nothing new!

I thought I would take you back in time, perhaps some of you may relive those simpler times when we drove drunk, in overcrowded cars with no GPS or mobile phones and we are still alive to tell the tale.

However, I'm also most likely taking you back to those; not so good mornings and days of hang-overs - where, when you woke up, your mouth did indeed feel and taste like the bottom of a cocky's cage!

I’m not providing recipes as Google has everything you need to revisit the making of these drinks especially if you want to revisit younger times or rediscover old ones. Arhh Good times....

EXTINCT or so close they are ENDANGERED:

http://amjaxon.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/06/Advocaat.jpgCherry Brandy and Advocaat

http://amjaxon.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/06/Cherry-brandy-advocaat.jpg

http://amjaxon.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/06/Two-dogs.jpgTwo dogs:

http://amjaxon.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/06/Two-dogs-coaster.jpgTwo Dogs was a ready-to-drink beverage that was first introduced in Australia in 1993 and went on to become available throughout the world. It was a lemon flavoured alcoholic beverage that is widely considered to have been the "world’s first brewed alcoholic lemonade"[1]    

(despite the pre-existence of traditional drinks like Zima), paving the way for similar products such as Hooper's Hooch and Mike's Hard Lemonade. Source Wikipedia.  There is only so much longevity in the drinking public's like of souped-up lemonade. 

http://amjaxon.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/06/Westcoast.jpgWest Coast Cooler:

West Coast Cooler is the original ready-to-drink from the 80s that has stood the test of time (well almost). Enjoy the exotic fruit flavours that complemented each giving a balanced, crisp refreshing drink. Real morning-after cocky cage stuff.... soooo sweet.

Claytons: 

The drink you had when you weren't having a drink. Such a successful ad campaign that the 'whole' Claytons personna took over social commentary and became a catch-cry for something ineffective or not the 'real' deal. Like he's a Claytons boyfriend... the boyfriend you have when you're not having a boyfriend. http://amjaxon.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/06/Claytons.jpg

Cold Duck:

Kaiser Stuhl is now reduced to a range of seven wine casks and one bottle product, Black Forest Moselle.

The period 1956 to 1975 were the the golden years of Kaiser Stuhl not only a wine story but an inspiring management story. Source Wikipedia. 

Blue Nun:  It's hard to keep a good woman down and she's back and more Golden!!  

Blue Nun is a German wine brand launched by the company H. Sichel Söhne (Mainz) in 1923 with the 1921 vintage, and which between the 1950s and http://amjaxon.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/06/Blue-Nun-1970.jpg1980s was a very popular international brand. For most of its existence, Blue Nun was a single German wine, which until the late 1990s was classified as a Liebfraumilch. Blue Nun can be said to have been the first wine to have been produced and effectively marketed with an international mass market in mind. Source Wikipedia

http://amjaxon.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/06/Fruity-lexia.jpgGoon and the Flagon: almost extinct, or gone the way of the Dodo… 

Usually and preferably filled with cheap sweet nasty wine!! And then there's that clothes line game with the bladders of goon

http://amjaxon.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/06/Coolibah.jpgMaking a comeback because of the “Wheel of Goon” or is that “Goon of Fortune” 

Only in Australia..... because for starters you need a Hills Hoist!

Rules of Goon of Fortune: Spin the line. Wherever the bladder lands, the adjacent person must tip their head back and take a drink. Repeat this until the last person is left standing; they are the winner! You are disqualified if you leave or refuse to take a drink.    

   

http://amjaxon.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/06/Cream-de-menthe.jpegLet's get specific:

The 70's: Those now Retro drinks:

Dust off those bottles of Crème de cacao, Creme de menthe, and Giuliano:

http://amjaxon.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/06/Raj.jpegRemember drinking a Grasshopper, it was like dessert and a drink in one. Most notable because it has both Crème de cacao and Creme de menthe in it. But it has made a pop culture return in the popular ‘Big Bang Theory’ when one of the main characters (Raj) was found to only be able to speak to women if he was drinking Alcohol. Low and behold The Grasshopper was the drink that unlocked his tied tongue!

 Brandy Alexander and other

heavy dessert-like drinks like a  White Russian    

The 80s: more than big hair and bigger shoulder pads...

Cinzano: Bianco, Vermouth and much, much more

http://amjaxon.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/06/Cinzano-range.jpg

Cinzano vermouths date back to 1757 and the Turin herbal shop of two brothers, Giovanni Giacomo and Carlo Stefano Cinzano, who created a new "vermouth rosso" (red vermouth) using "aromatic plants from the Italian Alps in a [still-secret] recipe combining 35 ingredients (including marjoram, thyme, and yarrow)". What became known as the "vermouth of Turin" proved popular with the bourgeoisie of Turin and, later, Casanova. Source Wikipedia.

Experience what were thought to be such witty and funny ads.... Oh how they've aged, good thing Joan Collins has aged far better than the inane humour on show here. Oh the shame!! 

White Zinfandel:

It's actually pink and is said to be making a comeback!! Whether adored or despised, 

White Zinfandel is like Donald Trump: inescapable.

Blue Lagoon:

More than the cringe-worthy movie of the same name whose cringe-worthy-ness was lead by Brooke Shields….. 

Sometimes drinks from the 80s JUST need to die... like Swan Gold:

http://amjaxon.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/06/swan-gold-prem.jpgThen Swan Premium came along, it was to compete with the top of the class, cream of the crop, best of the hops... Crown Lager. The ads were slick and sophisticated. 'They said you'd never make it.'  They hit right at the Aussie core. Unfortunately everyone in the ads (great achieving Australians: Greg Norman, Darryl Somers, Brad Hardie .. who?) seemed to fizzle as soon as they took a sip and appeared in the ads. Then eventually so did the beer... fizzled that is.

But then there was the America's Cup and that's worth looking at again as it was inspirational viewing.

Non-Alcoholic and or close extinct: 

Tang: selling point Astronaut's used to drink it in space!    

Tab: The Ad with 'The Body' herself, alas even Elle Macpherson couldn't save it!

Classed as one of, if not the first, 'Diet' soda, alas.... gone the way of  'New Coke'... Dead. 

Right!! Can you imagine any red-blooded Australian woman hugging her man after he's lusted after Elle Macpherson just because he's drinking a diet cola... MMMmm ads have certainly changed or is it we've got a little more sophisticated?

This is really only the tip of the iceberg! Anyway, I hope you enjoy the memories, maybe partake in some!

Dare you to…


When God created woman

Observations of a Middle-Aged Dragon with a Tattoo:

When God created woman
https://fbcdn-sphotos-e-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-xaf1/v/t1.0-9/11236146_10153820708039378_1858362986116217511_n.jpg?oh=51f7ad80d78ea8245344f85dcb50bb81&oe=57CD8092&__gda__=1474584102_82f3c0eec3389680be52270736619e4a

When God created woman, he was working late on the 6th day...

An angel came by and asked, "Why spend so much time on her?" 

The Lord answered. "Have you seen all the specifications I have to meet to shape her?"

“She must function in all kinds of situations.

She must be able to embrace several kids at the same time.

Have a hug that can heal anything from a bruised knee to a broken heart. 

She must do all this with only two hands.

She cures herself when sick and can work 18 hours a day"

The Angel was impressed, "Just two hands... impossible!

And this is the standard model?"

The Angel came closer and touched the woman, 

"But you have made her so soft, Lord.”

"She is soft”, said the Lord,

"But I have made her strong. You can't imagine what she can endure and overcome."

"Can she think?" The Angel asked... 

The Lord answered. "Not only can she think, she can reason and negotiate."

The Angel touched her cheeks...

"Lord, it seems this creation is leaking! You have put too many burdens on her."

"She is not leaking...it is a tear." The Lord corrected the Angel…

"What's it for?" Asked the Angel.

The Lord said, "Tears are her way of expressing her grief, her doubts, her love, her loneliness, her suffering and her pride."

This made a big impression on the Angel,

"Lord, you are a genius. You thought of everything.

A woman is indeed marvellous"

Lord said, "Indeed she is.

She has strength that amazes a man.

She can handle trouble and carry heavy burdens. 

https://fbcdn-sphotos-a-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-xap1/v/t1.0-9/12208321_10153675034289378_5461419776891743220_n.jpg?oh=b6ca61bf20e63ddb45281d601fc4819d&oe=57E0B6F7&__gda__=1473167266_aebde9a0c9eb9b530171d504fe154532She holds happiness, love and opinions.

She smiles when she feels like screaming.

She sings when she feels like crying, cries when happy and laughs when afraid.”

The Lord said, 

“She fights for what she believes in.

Her love is unconditional.

Her heart is broken when a 

next-of-kin or a friend dies but she finds strength to get on with life." 

The Angel asked: "So she is a perfect being?"

The lord replied: "No. She has just one drawback, she often forgets what she is worth."

Unknown.

Women know your worth and enjoy yourself: Dare you to…


The Most Golden of the Golden Girls

From A.M.:

 

Now this is humour old school style - it's worth watching all 33 of them

 

 

 

Enjoy.... Dare you to...